2021.11.29 18:40 whatisthisthing32 Report Domestic Violence/ABH to the police
New to Reddit, apologies if I break any rules.
I’ll try explain my situation best as I can. Then ask some questions
Ex partner been physically violent and abusive since mid 2019. Recently she became very bad and assaulted me quite viciously, drawing blood and bruising me.
I experienced the classic repeated cycle of attacking me, apologising and promising never to do it again. The last couple of years this has had huge effects on my mental health and enjoyment of life. I always forgave her, as she blamed her mental depression and I accepted that.
In terms of evidence, I have very strong evidence for the final attack (photo and video), and weaker or no evidence of previous attacks (eg chats with friends or counsellor only). This last attack was 6 weeks ago.
Seeing what has happened as ‘abusive’ is something that I’ve only accepted very very recently (last few days) with the help of counselling and some good friends.
At the moment, she has moved back in to her parents (she accepts responsibility for what she has done). Things are calm. No threats of further violence and I feel relatively safe. Things could end amicably, but she could change at a moments notice as she has a tendency to do. I know injunctions are there if I need them.
I am considering reporting the crime (domestic abuse/ABH) to the police formally, as a way of ideally preventing someone else suffering the same way in future. I’ve avoided this in the past as I didn’t want her to suffer, being arrested or questioned. She’s troubled enough already. But now I think if I don’t report it, it could happen to someone else undeserving.
I know however, that this degree of escalation will stop any chance of splitting of assets (shared ownership of house) as being amicable or quick. I also don’t want her to know I’m considering reporting this, as I don’t want to be blackmailing her in any way.
Is there anything I need to consider about the timing of making a report?
Anything to note about strength of evidence? Eg accounts from friends and the counsellor to back up what I have said?
Will reporting it sooner or later (by waiting for house to be sold and assets fairly split) damage any charges against her?
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